JC
- MUSIC FOCUS: Inspired by the music of Linkin Park.
- ACTIVITY FOCUS: Write chapter 4 of your story!
FAINT DECEMBER
Chapter 5: Nobody Can Save Me
I don’t know if it’s the darkness or the loneliness or what, but when I wake up in the middle of the night, I’m deep in a hole again. It feels like nobody can save me. Then I reach for my music and let it fill me up. I listen to Faint December’s words – the words written by Ben Chester – and the knowledge that I’m not the only one who feels the way I do calms me.
Ben’s voice asks me if I feel cold or if I feel lost and just in asking me he makes me feel those things less. The band’s drums remind me of an army marching. I feel as if I’m a part of that army and that we’re going somewhere good. The guitars rise up like a spring sun – and when the song reaches a climax, my heart feels strong enough to fight anything. I go back to sleep.
In the morning, despite my disturbed sleep, I wake up before Mum gets to me. I lie still and think about how difficult I’m finding it to get through each night. I mean, I’m used to it, but still I wonder if everyone has this layer of anxiety in them. Maybe everyone squirms in the night like I do; maybe everyone’s awake at three in the morning – filled by feelings of terror that surge through them like water breaking through a dam; maybe, like me, they’re just not talking about it. I roll onto my side and stare into the middle distance. Somehow, I don’t think that is the way it is. I don’t know for sure. It’s just what I think.
I can hear Mum moving about. I could get up before she comes to get me, but I won’t. I like to wait for her. I like the routine of it. I like knowing that each day there are certain things that will definitely happen. While I wait, I look at my phone. There’s a notification from Faint December. They’ve announced tour dates. They’re coming to England. I sit up like I’ve been given an electric shock. My heart is beating faster; they haven’t been in the country for three years and all that time ago I was only first discovering that music like theirs even existed. It’s not as if I had a cool older brother teaching me about cool music. Although isn’t that exactly what older brothers should be doing? Isn’t that their whole purpose? Not that it matters now. There’s no point wasting energy thinking about Josh’s failings as a mentor.
I snort out loud at the thought and as I do so, my bedroom door opens, and Mum comes in. She looks at me strangely. Who can blame her? As far as she can tell, I’m making animal noises for no reason.
“Time to get a shift on,” she says.
I can see the inquisitiveness in her bright blue eyes, but one of the things I love about my mum is that she knows when not to ask questions. I manage to nod at her and, when she’s gone, I catch sight of myself in the mirror. Maybe I really have experienced an electric shock. I mean, look at the state of my hair.
I throw my duvet off and get out of bed, almost tripping over myself and falling to the floor in the process. I need to get a grip. I march towards the bathroom. I shower and at last my brain slows to the point where I can articulate a plan. It’s Wednesday and tickets will go on sale on Friday. I have enough money but I’ll need Mum’s credit card to make the booking. How many tickets will I need to buy? One for Amber obviously. Will Lia and Chloe want to come? They don’t really listen to Faint December but it’s a night out in London. They’ll want to be a part of it. Back in my bedroom, I check the concert details. One person can buy a maximum of four tickets. Perfect.
ACTIVITY 1
Read the ‘whirlwind’ info (in blue). What does it tell us about the way Chester Bennington’s feeling and what’s happening in his life?
Papercut
“It’s like a whirlwind inside of my head.”
A whirlwind forms due to instabilities and turbulence created by heating and flow (current) gradients. Whirlwinds can vary in size and last from a couple minutes to a couple hours. A major whirlwind (such as a tornado) is formed from supercell thunderstorms (the most powerful type of thunderstorm). When the storms start to spin, they react with other high altitude winds, causing a funnel to spin. A cloud forms over the funnel, making it visible. A minor whirlwind picks up materials such as dust or snow as it moves over the ground, thus becoming visible. It is hard, though not impossible, to interrupt them. Minor whirlwinds are not as long-lived; the winds that form them do not last long, and when a minor whirlwind encounters an obstruction (a building, a house, a tree, etc.), its rotation is interrupted, as is the windflow into it, causing it to dissipate.
ACTIVITY 2
Why is the ‘falling sky’ simile so effective? How does it help us understand the feelings and actions of the person being described?
Talking To Myself
“You keep running like the sky is falling”
ACTIVITY 3
Forgotten
Now, this is a simile! But what does it mean? What does the image help us to understand?
“A little piece of paper with a picture drawn floats
On down the street ’til the wind is gone
And the memory now is like the picture was then”